I Have BADD

BADD stands for Blog Attention Deficit Disorder. I have had three different ones, quit them all and now am going back to the middle one. I feel like Sybil. Anyone old enough to remember that movie or book? Or have Netflix or a library?

I might include some of the things from the other blogs which had to do more with fashion and being a lady of a certain age. Okay 50. God. Still hard to say. But why? Because now my body is even telling me "Hey, get out of the game."

 The reproducing babies game. Which I've unofficially been out of for some time. Anyway, the intention here is to be honest even when I don't want to be because it's embarrassing or uncool or whatever.

I watched Game Change last night about Sarah Palin. Julianne Moore is a little older than me but she looks fantastic. I probably should have been paying attention to the story. Ha ha. I was, okay? And to Julianne Moore's taut facial skin. Dammit!

Full disclosure. I will tell you now, I am a left leaning liberal. I think. Not really all the way. There are definitely things I don't agree with on the far, far left but I'm left of center. I don't think most people are all the way left or right if they really admit it, but in today's political climate, it's almost like you have to pick teams like on a reality show. Politics has become like American Idol where you vote for your favorite sound byte. Okay, that got really political and serious. But it's hard to ignore politics in an election year. Believe me I've tried! Probably shouldn't admit that.

I went to high school in Texas. Most of the people I went to school with are Conservative Christian Republicans. That makes Facebook like a mine field. I feel like I'm going to piss someone off if I speak my mind. That's why I'm doing this here. It will hardly ever be this much about politics I think. We shall see. Feel free to comment and add your opinion. Please try to avoid personal attacks. This is a big world and we have a right to different opinions and I'd like to hear yours.

Love you. Bye.

Team Twilight or Team Harry Potter?

Even cats can't agree.

Sugar says "Want an apple?" She's TeamTwilight all the way.

  

Mews thinks he's also the chosen one. He likes "Hairy" Potter

For some reason, none of them seems to go for Team Jacob.

p.s. I like Harry. Yes, I am a nerd.

X-Teens Movie Review

My daughter saw the movie X-Men: First Class yesterday so I thought it was time for another Teen Movie Review.  I didn't think to jot down her response as she told me but I know her first words after the movie ended were "That was so awesome! That...was so...awesome!" So I guess it was pretty awesome.

She also said that January Jones from Mad Men was in it and she was actually not horrible. Which pleasantly surprised us both.

And guess who else is in it! Remember the dorky kid from About A Boy (one of my favorite movies)?

This is him now.

What? He's, like, super hot now. Those are my daughter's words, not mine...heh heh. Yeah.

I also didn't realize he played the super adorable bi-curious kid in A Single Man.

Which starred my boyfriend, Colin Firth

I mean...

Yeah, I know. That was funny, right Babe?

I need to get out more. Maybe next time I'll actually watch a movie and review it myself. Hmmm, we may be on to something.

Chuck Norris Rules

Found this posted behind a store on a random street in my town

Awesome.  I'm old enough to remember when he was just Walker, Texas Ranger and not a demi-god. I love the Chuck Norris jokes. Here are a few of my favorites:

Chuck Norris doesn't walk on water. He swims on land.

Death once had a near-Chuck experience.

Chuck Norris doesn't sleep. He waits.

Me giving this sign a thumbs up. I wonder what Chuck Norris Rules would actually be?

I before E but not before Chuck Norris.

2+2=whatever Chuck Norris says it does.

Do unto others what Chuck Norris would do unto you---you wish!

Can you think of anymore? I'll bet he can.

I'm Back

Took a long break from both blogs. I got crazy busy and now have a month coming up with just one job and a big project. That's like vacationing for me.

I missed performing comedy tonight because I got sick and had to go to the Ear, Nose and Throat doctor. I'm on antibiotics and steroids. You know what that means!! 'Roid Rage! I can blame any bad behavior on that. And I will. Once steroids are gone I will go back to blaming Menopause or whatever else is handy.

I did see some funny things at the doctor's office though and luckily got some snaps.

What is this nun trying to give people? It looks gross and inappropriate. Come on, lady. The people here are already sick!

Yeah, for real. It's an antique. People used to douche their noses, I guess. I hope that clear thing in front is a spoon.

It's A Tough Job...

My friend, Sarah Tiana, had a birthday party. She's a terrific comedian and a really sweet gal.

Also, she's a Southern girl like me so the food was awesome.

Taquitos, y'all

Chips y'all

My good friend, Nini, was there. She manages to do comedy even though she's a single mom and has four kids. And they are all giants like her. She's an inspiration to me and I feel I can never complain about how hard it is to be a single mom and get onstage. At least I try not to complain around her.

Unfortunately I only got a few pictures at the beginning before it got crowded.

But some other friends showed up. My good friend Christina Pazsitzky who is kicking ass and taking names.

And Chris Franjola who, while I was taking a break, managed to get a writing gig on Chelsea Lately. I'm not surprised. He's hilarious.

Some other people were there like Jeff Ross. Who I don't know. Okay, I'm totally dropping names now but hey! It's Hollywood, Baby! Also, I don't get out much so I'm really impressed with myself. Part of doing comedy is hanging out with people. It really is a relationship based business and, of course, you have to be good. I love Sarah, though, and would have gone even if it was full of people even dorkier than me.

In closing, Nini is famous for her birthday cakes. This one we lovingly dubbed the Lemon Turd Cake.
(p.s. It was delish)

They want ME...(don't get too excited)

Just registered for jury duty today. I start calling in next week.

I've never had to serve on a jury before. I either couldn't because of the kind of work I was doing or wasn't picked. I'm feeling like my time is running out. Yipes!

Now, I know jury duty is the privilege of living in a free coutry but it's kind of like labor pains are a privilege of being fertile. I don't know. As I said, I haven't done it yet so it might not be that bad.

Here's the thing. There are tons of lawyer shows and crime shows on TV and I like some of them. So all I know from these is that the lawyers are the ones having all the fun and the jury looks bored stiff. Like most comedians and actors, I'd rather be performing than sitting in the audience. I need kind of a lot of attention and the thought of having to sit in a box for hours without being able to read or go online or move around when I want terrifies me.

Plus in TV and movies the whole process clips along pretty quickly and then someone has an "Aha moment" because a witness knows what Prada shoes are or something.

And I have to admit I'll be horribly disappointed if someone can't just go up and read the truth on someone's face like on Lie To Me or The Mentalist. Or have a ghost reveal the real criminal like on Medium. Real life is so BORING! Ha ha. Not really. I like it. Just don't want to sit in a box for a long time.

The Jury by John Morgan

Ugh. Plus I hate people.

Not you, of course. Them.

What about you? Do you have any good jury stories?